Originally posted April 23, 2019 / Revised September 16, 2023
In the courtroom’s dimly lit hallway, tension hung thick in the air. It was July 23, 2015, a day that marked another chapter in our seemingly endless battle against parental alienation. Little did we know, 16 months of legal turmoil, four court appearances, several false accusations, and countless emptied bank accounts awaited us.
Our journey through this harrowing ordeal had stretched on for over 7 and a half years, accomplishing little beyond breaking our spirits. Our previous Guardian Ad Litem (GAL) had let us down when she failed to change custody in 2011, despite having the evidence and authority to do so. Unbeknownst to us, her track record was marred by her probation for failing to inform a father about a crucial court date, which ultimately led to him losing custody of his children. Her slap on the wrist punishment allowed her to continue practicing law while paying a mere $1,000 fine. I couldn’t help but hold her responsible, in part, for the parental alienation that had torn my husband away from his children.
Sitting outside the courtroom, we observed the alienator’s latest scheme unfurl. She summoned her attorney with an air of urgency, presenting a folder filled with enlarged photographs. Her demeanor screamed that she had a well-planned agenda, and it sent alarm bells ringing in our heads.
Staying one step ahead of the alienator had become our modus operandi. She thrived on blindsiding us with false allegations just before we entered the courtroom.
Jack and I put our heads together, trying to anticipate her move. We replayed every moment from the kids’ last visit, searching for anything that could be twisted against us.
And then it hit me.
The previous weekend, Liam and our dog Gus had been playing by the lake. At one point, Gus playfully jumped up and accidentally brushed against Liam’s leg, causing him to slip and scrape the outside of his leg.
That seemingly innocent incident was about to be turned against us.
Our attorney approached, his face grim. He informed us that the alienator had presented the court with photographs of Liam’s injuries from what she was dubbing a vicious dog attack that had occurred at our home the previous weekend.
What we later discovered was that in order to obtain those pictures, Liam’s mother and sisters had resorted to name-calling and forcibly held him down when he initially refused to cooperate.
Liam was only 13 years old at the time.
I blame the system- if any scratch or bruise becomes a big deal and used in court, then it will. The judge should laugh it off as stupid to even bring up. I get bruises I do not even recall how they happened.
Hi! Thank you very much indeed for this phenomenal and brilliant website. I’m delighted I found it. My ex-husband has been utiising parental alienation on me for thirty-seven (37) years and it still continues despite our daughters are 51 and 46 years of age. He informed me in the late spring 1985 that “I know you love them more than life but I’m going to use them to hurt and spite you”. He did. I believe he’s done this because he hates his mother so much to the extreme and he’s taking it out on me. I replied to him “Please don’t as you will be hurting and spiting them”. He replied ” don’t care I’m going to do it anyway”. He most certainly did an d continues. I believe he is mentally very ill. We have two who are the children of my younger daughter and now she is doing the same thing with her 2 children. They live in New Jersey which takes parental alienation more seriously and will be the first state to pass a law making it a crime. I’ll be writing to the people who would be the people to commence making parental alienaton a crime. Hopefully my case of 37 years will be the one to make those in the NJ state Congress get moving. I’ve been tring to get an attoreny for a v ery long time. No success to date. I apologise for rambling.
Please tell me more about your work and your organisation. Thank you very much indeed.
Best regards,
Joan Hoye